This blog is me lay it all out there! You might want to judge the hell out of me for doing it, But this is me with my feeling and Where I am. I need to be truthful to the way I feel and what I am going though, Yes it is not the correct media to do it, But its the best soap box I have at the moment! and I need to move forward.
So I have been facing some, trying for baby/ pregnancy issues and have been trying to work them out (for the last 6 months) what to do. I have been in limbo and have not continue my training out of fear, ( As my mind has been playing the whole "its your fault you trained too hard and killed the last 2 babies" (lost another one in nov -dec) thing) Which is not true I know that but my head goes there anyway. So that has lead to me stacking on some weight, out of fear, stress and mind games plus I have been regretting trying to have the next baby due to the extra weight. I have been really stuck with how to work this all out and how to move forward!
I have come up with the following.
I have made 2 plans for the year. One is my goals for the year if I am not pregnant, with all of my training schedule, fun runs and tri's, Half marathon in June, Hockey and so on month by month.
The second plan is is for when I fall pregnant and it is an guideline for my eating exercise and what goals I want with that time line of the 9 months.
I am not going to put my plan's up at the moment and may never.
I might fail at this baby thing! that is a true fear I have, But i am very lucky that I have Little Miss and OH. What I cant fail at is me. I must move forward and I must look after myself and the family I have.
This is the vent that had to happen!
ox Trace.
Finished a quilt
13 years ago
Trace good on you for putting it out there. I tried for a baby for years and I feel for you. I do hope you get what you want and have another little one.
ReplyDeleteI think your goals are good. keep doing what you are doing, then revise in need.
You are right - you MUST look after you and the family you already have. The rest will follow.
Take care.
xox
Ditto to what Kyles said.
ReplyDeleteWhen it comes to bubs I really think things happen for a reason and when the time is right. I know how easy it is to go mental over "what have i done".
xoxox chin up lots of hugs to you and your little family
Yep everynoe in Brissy is all good - called Mum earlier and they are fine. Dad works at the uni and got sent home as the river is rising
ReplyDeleteI hope all is well on your side xo